This article is part of the Foreign News Aggregators series.
Dear Leader Names Son Kim Jong Un As "Excellent Leader" and Successor and 100 Star General of People's Tank Artillery of Korea
Successful Reign of Kim Jong Il Celebrated With Fireworks, Immense Parade, Flyover of Capital By Formation of Soviet Jet Planes Built in 1965
Dear Leader in Spirit of Benevolent Forgiveness Allows Contempted Prisoners to Look Briefly at Photographs of Family Members Previously Executed as Traitors
Kim Jong Il to Use Down Time to Pen Heroic Novel: "Incredible Lover Who is Also a Genius Spy and a President of All of Asia"
Excellent Leader Considers Important First Deadly Incident Along Korean Border, Said to Be Leaning Towards Classic Ambush of Joint Patrol
Record Obedience of Rules Credited to Southern Regional Party Commander Jin Il Dong's 2010 Face Caning Policy
Heroic Road Links Previous Roads By Road, "Such a Road" Say Marveling Onlookers
Science Study: North Korean Male Organ Most Compatible With Pleasure of Any Race
Plutonium-239 Declared Most Juche Isotope By Our Nation's Journey of Eternal Unanimity and Strength Into Tomorrow Magazine
Jet Helicopter May Be Possible In Our Lifetime
Kim Jong Il Museum of Shirts Opens to All Heroes Wishing to See Dear Leader's Shirts, Tunics, Undershirts, and Lumbar Braces
Coward USA Prepares to Elect Witch to Senator, Will Use Occult Superstitions to Battle Korean Unification
500 Million Crazed Capitalist Pig Dogs Utilize Face Book to Grow Eggplants and Horses to Eat on a Computer
USA VP Joe Biden Tells Liberals to "Quit Whining" About Failure to Enact Revolutionary Changes to Collapsing, Rotten Society Doomed to Disappear Into History
Gay Music Teen Commits Suicide Because of Decadent Western Obsession With Technology
Japan Afraid of China, Ignores People's Navy Heroic Kidnapper Submarine in Tokyo Bay, Hostesses Captured
Netherlands, Too Weak to Place Muslim Dissidents in Reeducation Work Camps, Opts to Ban Islamic Veils
BP Oil Well Still Releasing Oil Into Gulf of Mexico Because of USA Foolishness and Greed
Chilean Miners Request Portraits of Dear Leader, Copies of On the Juche Idea
Shark Jump Ends in Gruesome Tragedy: Kim Jong Il Commissions Remake of Happy Days to Reveal Misery of Population of USA During Nostalgic Time Periods
DPRK Internet Revealed, Will Use Artillery to Transmit Information Across Great Distances
Nigeria Exchanges Oil for Tools and Supplies of North Korean Rocket Launchers Inside Turnip Crates
Pope Realizes All Religion is Lies and Embraces the Revolutionary Spirit: It Could Happen By 2011
Celebration of Excellent Leader to Allow Color of Red on Shirts for One Month
Book: Bloody Meat Grinder of Afghanistan Haunts Obama Dreams With Skull Visage and Cries for More Capitalist Blood to Lubricate the Gears of the USA War Machine
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
Sorry about the blurry photo. I was lunging at my phone, yelling at it to take a clear picture. It's the only image of me that exists. I'd take another picture for you, but I'm in the middle of a rigorous trampoline session.
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