The stewardesses on the flight are really nice, but they refuse to give you more soda. You're trying to concentrate about the games, but Chad keeps bothering you with his hands and whispers. Hopefully he'll disappear soon. You put headphones in to block out his voice and the memories of what you had to do for this plane ticket. Transformers is blaring into your ears from the in-flight movie, which is cool, but you already have it for your PSP, so you decide to meditate to music instead. You're bummed to see that you only have two CDs to choose from. Do you select Significant Other by Limp Bizkit or The Very Best of Bread by Bread? Making the wrong choice could have devastating effects on your journey for gold.
What if you were a cop and the Skittle was mentally disturbed and wanted to be eaten?
DOPPELGANGER NEEDED - To minimize stress to my dog, I'm looking for somebody who is identical to me to take over ownership. Must also be able to fool my wife. Call to set up interview. 555-8252
I'll never forgive these giant alien insects! I'm trying!
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.