You aren't sure what's so special about the opening ceremony, but something is making your heart skip a beat. Perhaps it's national pride, or the ridiculous scene of a man being lifted on wires to light the torch, or maybe it's the hundreds of Asian girls dancing around for three hours. Whatever it is, you're sure there's magic around. Yes, you must compete in the Olympics. This is your chance for fame, for glory, for a girlfriend-an Asian one! On the other hand, your torrents desperately need seeded.
Do yourself a favor and don't click on any of these buttons down here.
Trying to change history is a terrible mistake. Tearing down all of America's Hitler statues has left us confused about our nation's proud past.
Ask any cowboy and they'll tell you: The deadliest snake in the wild west is Lava-Filled Hole Shaped Exactly Like A Cowboy Silhouette
Ben Garrison's Cartoons are finally explained!
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.