He fucked four of your best friends, his coworker, and a neighbour: DO YOU REKINDLE THE FLAME? -Cosmo— cass (@casskeeley) January 28, 2013
yo mamas titties just won a sag award— lauren ashley bishop (@sbellelauren) January 28, 2013
My greatest fear is dying in a car crash whilst on my iPhone checking the operating hours of my local Carl's Jr.— Sean Brewster (@TheSeanBrewster) January 27, 2013
*picks up modern dildo w/ too many bells and whistles, shakes head* they just don't make em how they used to.— Jennifer (@FourEyedQueef) January 27, 2013
It doesn't matter if you're socially unreliable, so long as you have cigarettes, a sexy raspy voice & an undiagnosed personality disorder— Ｃｈｉｍ ｎｅｙ (@WarmCigarette) January 27, 2013
futuresex/lovesounds had like 1 good song on it and everyone reveres it. if you like that album so much check out Music By Black People— cal50 (@cal50) January 27, 2013
Forget Target or Best Buy, if you want deals this Black Friday you can't do better than smoking massive, mind-melting quantities of DMT.
A reluctant family is forced to welcome a non-human participant to Thanksgiving dinner.
You cant go around life being smart in an unconventional way, it could change the world.
Everything worth reading from Twitter in one handy, horrible place!