Where's the forum for Oompa Loompas?

Aunt Flow baked us a delicious soup today. It was ever so good!

Let's not even get into the topic of children. These people should all be sterilized anyway.

I don't have any questions. Please get off my property.

Oh Luna Faye, what won't you believe?

Uhm...er... I have to, walk, over there now...

AND THEN I WRAPPED THE BITCH IN SOME CARPET AND THREW HER OFF A BRIDGE.

You know I learned something tonight. FAE-borns are really sensitive people who need our support. They may not be the most normal people in the world but gosh darnitt, they deserve our love and respect.

...

Haha wierdos.

More The Weekend Web

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

About This Column

There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.

Previous Articles

Suggested Articles

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.