The very idea of a Mulholland Dr. forum amuses me.


Having a favorite character from "Enterprise" is like having a favorite position to be raped in.

I saw some speghetti with a matchbook lurking around the church last Sunday.

Haha porns.

Hi I'm posting through Babelfish!

You think you are a samurai because you have a mental illness.

The biggest upset of the 1996 Oscars was that Santa with Muscles didn't win a single award that it was nominated for. I wrote an angry letter to the Academy and they said, "What?"

More The Weekend Web

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.

  • Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'

Copyright ©2015 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.