Sorry to say this but you only have six weeks to live.
Congrats! Your first STD!
All of them.
Yes, that's why they explode.
TUPAC'S MOM SPOTTED
She totally diagnosed herself.
Girl, you have no idea.
Special thanks to untriedanduntested, Housemaster, Sensible_Psycho, Stutes, FruMoogle, Kauka, Seven Five Nine, most erotic flower, vlad3217, HulkaMatt, Bag of Glass, big mean giraffe, Khad, Karma Sutra, Hawkstein, King Bowflexious, YouPube, Posture_Pal, big duck equals goose, Meitnerium, and szud who truly are the wind beneath my wings. They create drag that helps me fly!
What if you were a cop and the Skittle was mentally disturbed and wanted to be eaten?
DOPPELGANGER NEEDED - To minimize stress to my dog, I'm looking for somebody who is identical to me to take over ownership. Must also be able to fool my wife. Call to set up interview. 555-8252
I'll never forgive these giant alien insects! I'm trying!
There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.