Sorry to say this but you only have six weeks to live.
Congrats! Your first STD!
All of them.
Yes, that's why they explode.
TUPAC'S MOM SPOTTED
She totally diagnosed herself.
Girl, you have no idea.
Special thanks to untriedanduntested, Housemaster, Sensible_Psycho, Stutes, FruMoogle, Kauka, Seven Five Nine, most erotic flower, vlad3217, HulkaMatt, Bag of Glass, big mean giraffe, Khad, Karma Sutra, Hawkstein, King Bowflexious, YouPube, Posture_Pal, big duck equals goose, Meitnerium, and szud who truly are the wind beneath my wings. They create drag that helps me fly!
Did you know that you only use 10% of your brain? You may have heard that before. But what if you could use 100%? YOU CAN!
This is where the excerpt from an article usually goes. Since the content of this update is only intended for cool people, I refuse to place a single word in the path of blundering normal people.
There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.