Sorry to say this but you only have six weeks to live.
Congrats! Your first STD!
All of them.
Yes, that's why they explode.
TUPAC'S MOM SPOTTED
She totally diagnosed herself.
Girl, you have no idea.
Special thanks to untriedanduntested, Housemaster, Sensible_Psycho, Stutes, FruMoogle, Kauka, Seven Five Nine, most erotic flower, vlad3217, HulkaMatt, Bag of Glass, big mean giraffe, Khad, Karma Sutra, Hawkstein, King Bowflexious, YouPube, Posture_Pal, big duck equals goose, Meitnerium, and szud who truly are the wind beneath my wings. They create drag that helps me fly!
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
Do you remember the crazy clothes and hair of the 1990s? Do you remember Crystal Pepsi and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Do you remember where you hid the box your mother gave you?
It's still okay to like Ben Stiller, guys.
There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.