She's just a bitch! Whack her in the face with a shovel and have your way with her. You earned it son.
I lost my virginity to a tire pump.
Read the directions on the back of the box. If that fails, learn to read.
You need to raise your standards my friend. And by that I mean raise them to the 200-250 pound range.
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Lay there as still as you possibly can. Don't enjoy it or make a sound. That's considered rude!
Sir Mix-a-Lot's classic follow up to "Baby Got Back" has serious unintended consequences.
"Really, Holmes!" I dropped into my seat, shocked. "You are remarkably tall! What are you, six foot six? Six foot eight?"
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