Zack: Almost as ubiquitous as the boobs, and often sharing the image: sexual menace.
Steve: Maybe they're just at a horror-themed nightclub and he is just trying to pick her up. I bet you didn't consider that, did you?
Zack: "Girl, was your dad a druid? Cuz I want the planets to align so I can sacrifice you to my bog god in a wicker man."
Steve: Why don't you come back to my place and we can put on hitchhiker faces and chase each other around my tunnels.
Zack: "Girrrl, I saw you lookin' at my sword. You like these runes? This one is the rune for silk sheets and this one stands for Audi."
Steve: Ignore the vultures. They came with my lair.
"I thought the internet was all fun and games. Grow virtual plants on Facebook. Send email to grandma. IM friends with emojis," said the Stupid Ass Teenager, currently dying in an Idiot County hospital. "Never in my wildest dreams could I ever possibly humanly imagine that doing stupid ass internet shit in real life might get me mortally injured."
(Lips smacking, mouth full of peanut butter, glistening streams of peanut butter oil running down chin) "I'm full as hell, and I'm not going to take another bite!"
Bonk: The Only Good Bonk Is A Head Bonk
We review every game from the last 2 months, plus all 21 SNES Classic titles
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.