A Stinging Surprise

This was already broken by the Second Life Insider, but some forum goons let me in on the backstory.

Seems some upstanding young members of the goon group w-hat were approached by a furry named Dj Wolcott in Second Life. Wolcott, an admin of the furry group Furpleasure--which had crashed the Baku grid earlier that week--wanted to contract w-hat to do a "hit" on another furry group. Hey, I guess if they can have a Furry United Nations they can have Furry Wars.

In any case, these young gentlegoons wanted to let it be known that w-hat never griefs for profit like mere mercenaries. And because I know how everyone loves chatlogs (on the Internet!) here are some selections from the sting, which was conducted against a member of an ancient order!

A Dark And Shadowy PlaceDeathmike Germparrot: DJ at furpleasure everybody
Deathmike Germparrot: now if i get this right DJ is in interested in contracting W Hat to grief places
Dj Walcott: thats right
Deathmike Germparrot: mr funkerton will take over negotations
Dj Walcott: Ok
Funkerton Freelunch: Correct.
Dj Walcott: so whats the deal?
Sara Hebert: What is it you're looking for?
Dj Walcott: prices
Sara Hebert: For... what?
Dj Walcott: all i am looking for at the current time re prices
Forrar Fanwood: what places do you want to have griefed specifically. prices would vary based on that
Dj Walcott: No deal
Sara Hebert: It's kind of hard to really set a price for something with so few details.
Dj Walcott: you tell me basic prices first then we negotiate when and where after the money is delivered
Sara Hebert: Let's just start over from the beginning.
Sara Hebert: What would we need to do?
Dj Walcott: some Greefing
Dj Walcott: if you are TRULY members of W-hat
Dj Walcott: then you know the deal the hams have with Furpleasure
Funkerton Freelunch: True members?
Sara Hebert: Don't mention the W-Hat inner circle, Funk!
Sara Hebert: OHSH
Dj Walcott: How much for the tools to do this
Forrar Fanwood: yeah. just to get this solid though, you are offering 2000 linden dollars in exchange for griefy particle rezzers, and possibly recursive physics scripts
Dj Walcott: define recrsice physics scripts
Forrar Fanwood: scripts which would create physical objects in a recursive of nested fashion
Dj Walcott: what is the likelyhood of one of those crashing a sim?
Forrar Fanwood: 100%
Forrar Fanwood: I recall several instances where objecs like that released on the mainland caused entire grid outages
Forrar Fanwood: The question is are you interrested in this or not
Dj Walcott: i am
Deathmike Germparrot: and is you doing this as a indvidual or on behalf of FP
Sara Hebert: We need to know who to contact, and if you're offline and we can talk to others, that would help a lot.
Forrar Fanwood: working for an organization is different from working for an individual
Dj Walcott: me
Forrar Fanwood: as that the morals behind it, however lacking, change
Dj Walcott: thats all you need to know[
Forrar Fanwood: have you ever seen munich?
Dj Walcott: was a shit movie
Forrar Fanwood: munich was a utilitarian essay on ethics, and I would appreciate if you would stop talking poorly about it. reguardless there are some things we need to know up front
Dj Walcott: Hollywood is nothing more then Leftwing democratic scum
Dj Walcott: now i am also willing to come to work for you in order to buy protection for Furpleasure
Deathmike Germparrot: expand on this point further dear DJ
Sara Hebert: What did they do to warrant this attempt at griefing, anyways? Just for some background.
Dj Walcott: money
Dj Walcott: they took form me a total sum of 15000L
Sara Hebert: Feted Inner Core. Elitist jerks.
Dj Walcott: If the lindens only knew who REALLY made the world go around
Deathmike Germparrot: and who does make SL go round?
Forrar Fanwood: AT&T/MA BELL make the world go round now days
Dj Walcott: no the REAL wold my little froddy fellow
Sara Hebert: The media?
Deathmike Germparrot: the jews?
Dj Walcott: Older than the media
Deathmike Germparrot: masons?
Dj Walcott: Bingdo This is the face of terrorDeathmike Germparrot: so your a freemason
Dj Walcott: Ahh yes i am
Dj Walcott: as well as a Knight Templar
Sara Hebert: So were these folks who angered you freemasons, or something?
Dj Walcott: Could be Sara
Sara Hebert: I don't really want to mess with any masons, online or off..
Dj Walcott: then you know it isnt wise to cross us
Forrar Fanwood: anyway, enough of this conspiracy skulduggery and stuff. just tell us when, where, and what
Sara Hebert: Actually, I think we need to know something else first.
Dj Walcott: that is
Sara Hebert: How can we be sure you're not going to hit something we don't want you to hit?
Deathmike Germparrot: like Baku
Dj Walcott: You tll me what you dont want hit
Dj Walcott: Baku is safe
Deathmike Germparrot: also leave Prokofy Neva alone. we have a "deal" with the SLS over her
Sara Hebert: If this is over 15,000, this is worth a lot more to you than 2000, no?
Deathmike Germparrot: 1000 up front
Deathmike Germparrot: 1200 later
Dj Walcott: No deal
Dj Walcott: see ya
Funkerton Freelunch: Wait
Funkerton Freelunch: One last thing
Funkerton Freelunch: DJ
Funkerton Freelunch: Please listen to my last point.
Dj Walcott: being
Forrar Fanwood: SMILE YOUR ON CANDID CHATLOG! I LOVE SURPRISES!Sara Hebert: We've been working on this case for YEARS.
Sara Hebert: FINALLY
Sara Hebert: They might build a house at us.
Dj Walcott: just talk
Sara Hebert: Thomas Jefferson is dead, sir.
Sara Hebert: Who can save you now?
Funkerton Freelunch: We did this for Uncle Sam.

Furry wars? Electronic whores? These are not things I see shown in press releases or news articles about Second Life! I demand equal representation! We shall make our own virtual utopia, with our own propaganda! WE SHALL FEAR FURSECUTION NEVERMORE!

Thanks to:

  • buddy for the drawings.
  • Isometric Bacon for the video.
  • Deathmike and company for the sting.
  • CaptainWinky for the burn.
  • – Chris "Petey" Peterson

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