It's been established that people are willing to pay premium prices for clothing that arrives already in disrepair. People buy pre-ripped jeans, which, all things considered, might be the stupidest purchasable item ever conceived. Now Easy Tiger Corp has started peddling pre-stained underwear in an attempt to test the limits of consumers' sadistic appetite for debased apparel. The skid marks allegedly contain no actual fecal matter, a revelation that eliminates the health-based argument against owning Easy Tiger briefs. Countless aesthetic objections remain.
Unlike pre-ripped jeans manufacturers, Easy Tiger acknowledges the inherent goofiness of its product line. But like pre-ripped jeans manufacturers, Easy Tiger sells something that no one with even a vague semblance of intelligence would even consider buying at any price, or accepting for free, or agreeing to wear for a modest salary.
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
Expendable? You must be joking.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.