A briss is an important occasion for a Jewish family, during which a child is circumcised and given a Hebrew name. Naturally, such ceremonies put people in the mood to party, especially with a cheesy DJ with a laptop full of Paul Oakenfold MP3s! But KeysDAN doesn't only books brisses. Instead, he offers his services at bridal showers, pet celebrations ("opening our hearts to a new pet is a jubilant time"), and even "no reason, no season -- just party!"
A self-proclaimed "master of karaoke jams," KeysDAN also excels at futuristic Max Headroom-style stuttering. Truly this man wears many hats. ("Contrary to the common belief, the DJ does more than just push play. We are a personal assistant, reception coordinator, master of ceremonies, party host, dance instructor, and disc jockey. ") Also, he sells many hats with his face on them, along with similarly emblazoned buttons, magnets and framed tiles. Clearly KeysDAN can do just about anything, other than designing a Web site that isn't a complete laughingstock.
All the amazing predictions from The Simpsons that finally came true in 2016.
This is very real. As an insider I possess damning evidence that could utterly destroy Something Awful. This website has many enemies who appear to be coming to power in the United States. They probably have lots of money at their disposal, and I could really use some.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.