For some reason, people actually read this article. Even more confusing, some people actually take the time to make video responses to the videos I make fun of.
And I thought I had entirely too much time on my hands.
The original: this abomination
The creator: WWWPPPSSS
My thoughts: This is somehow even more disturbing than the original. Jesus Christ.
Score: -14485819591 out of 5.
The original: Chuggo - "C'mon, Fuck a Guy"
The creator: toymasheenSH
My thoughts: Slightly fruity with a pungent aftertaste and a slight hint of Oak.
Score: 3.8 out of AHHHHH C'MON FUCK A GUY
The original: Tehhh
The creator: ShantyKifer
My thoughts: LEAVE RICK JAMES ALONE BITCH TEH TEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH TEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Score: z0r out of w00t
The original: Jesus Christ, I don't even fucking know.
The creator: hellointernet
My thoughts: I will not be at all surprised if hellointernet brings about Armageddon some day. Hail Satan.
Score: out of 11
The original: Down Load Rap and Submit
The creator: granpoco
My thoughts: Papa Jim is iller than Eazy-E's HIV test and doper than Method Man's bong.
Score: FAR OUT DADDY-O.
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
Youtube user HolkHogan420 has been systematically exposing all of the Illuminati's plans.
As you may have noticed, the most popular viral videos at any given time are amazingly banal, annoying, and cliched pieces of waste. It almost seems as if the internet naturally gravitates towards the worst possible Youtube and Google video selections. So it stands to reason that if the terrible videos become popular, then the unpopular videos must be awesome! We here at Something Awful present to you AwfulVision™, our own patented service dedicated to showcasing a wide selection of unpopular videos that apparently must be good! Welcome to Web 3.9. Welcome to AwfulVision™!