Submitted by Paul Rice
For all of you out there who were hoping against all odds this week for a video featuring a 50+ year old guy guy tho looks like a combination of Patton Oswalt and Curly from the 3 Stooges playing the violin and then discussing lame-ass internet drama, this one's for you.
P.S. this is video one of a god-knows-how-many part series. woot
P.P.S. Check out his other videos. Nothing says "awesome" like a lumpy old man with a hardon for Linux and spelling nazism.
That about does it for this week! Sorry to cut it short this time, but I feel like I'm coming down with the flu or something! Feel free to email me and wish me a speedy death, or for that matter, send some videos for next time. Thanks to the usual suspects, word to your mother, peace ya'll. I'm outie.
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
Do you remember the crazy clothes and hair of the 1990s? Do you remember Crystal Pepsi and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Do you remember where you hid the box your mother gave you?
Were you enjoying your day? STOP! There is outrageous crap going on you need to know about!
As you may have noticed, the most popular viral videos at any given time are amazingly banal, annoying, and cliched pieces of waste. It almost seems as if the internet naturally gravitates towards the worst possible Youtube and Google video selections. So it stands to reason that if the terrible videos become popular, then the unpopular videos must be awesome! We here at Something Awful present to you AwfulVision™, our own patented service dedicated to showcasing a wide selection of unpopular videos that apparently must be good! Welcome to Web 3.9. Welcome to AwfulVision™!