Exit through the door.
Sing a song to the earth-animal. Be careful not to be bitten!
All hail Xxanthia!
Planet strong with might!
We will go to your planet,
And FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!
Put the tiny furry Earthling in your briefcase to take as a gift to Microsoft. It is considered impolite in human culture to go to Microsoft without bearing a small token of goodwill. This would make an excellent gift!
> Drop sandwich
I have placed the small creature in my "brief case".
Climb the ladder carefully. Press X when in front of ladders to climb!
I have emerged from the underground lair.
Walk towards the red dude and ask him how to get to microsoft.
The human replies by presenting a sharp metallic object and demanding my "wallet".
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.