Flattery is your only way out of this. "Nice ass", and quickly.
You might want to arm yourself at the same time though, just in case.
Careful. Research shows that this human is in possession of a "brief case," a storage device that can easily be converted into a weapon.
Human has fled while shouting "monster". It has dropped a "brief case".
The human club is quite powerful.
Well done, disarm your weapon again and pick up this..."brief case" its contents may help you later.
"Brief case" obtained.
Warning! Large metallic vehicle has approached and opened its doors. I am going inside.
I have entered the large metallic vehicle and it is moving at a high rate of speed in the direction of "downtown".
Perform a dance on the pole.
take that communication device from the human and use it to contact microsoft.
"Come in Microsoft."
"Jerry? Is that you?"
How do I reply?
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
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