[CHACHA.COM] get people to help you search for crap that doesn't exist
Status: Connected to guide: AnneC
AnneC: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
You: hiya anne!
AnneC: How are you?
You: i'm wondering why the eagles keep losing in the nfl football thing
You: i'm excellent i hope you're fine
AnneC: I'm good thanks
You: now you see my friend has some conspiracy theory
AnneC: Thanks for coming to ChaCha! Give me a moment while I do all your searching for you!
You: he thinks it's because of some sorta plan by george bush
You: to make them lose
You: so more people will sign up for the military from philly
You: i told him it was a lie
AnneC: I'll find exactly what u need
You: well can you actually send the info to andy reid
You: c/o eagles
You: he probably needs to know more than i do
AnneC: Whats his email
You: hold on i have this written down somewhere
You: give me a sec
You: ok it's email@example.com i think
You: i hope you turn up enough info to help him
AnneC: No Problem
You: i really need them to do well this season
AnneC: Can I find anything else for you?
You: no thanks anne, you're a gem
You: high five
AnneC: Have a great night!
AnneC: Thank you for using ChaCha!
Status: Session ended.
Status: Connected to guide: AmandaJ
AmandaJ: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
AmandaJ: How are you tonight?
You: I am fine! How are you?
AmandaJ: I'm doing wonderful, thanks!
AmandaJ: So you would like some info on building wooden crosses?
You: That is good to hear. Yes I was trying to find some information on building a large wooden cross
You: preferably around 12 feet tall or so
AmandaJ: I'll get right on that
AmandaJ: I appreciate your patience while I find exactly what you need.
You: thank you maam! Take all the time you need
You: you are serving a good purpose!
AmandaJ: Well thank you
AmandaJ: is this for outdoor purposes, I assume?
You: Oh yes, most certainly!
AmandaJ: What problems are you running into?
You: I was just looking for some general directions. I would probably be able to put something together on my own though
AmandaJ: I imagine you'll have to have a nice sturdy bottom... probably a concrete base to support it
You: Instead of that, could you help me find something on different types of wood? Like which ones burn easily but are fairly sturdy?
You: Yes that is true, although I was thinking something more along the lines of cables
AmandaJ: So you are looking to ignite the wood?
You: Well yes eventually. Possibly something that burns fairly brightly and emits a good bit of heat
AmandaJ: This isn't a really relevant site
AmandaJ: it has a couple pointers
AmandaJ: I'll continue to search and again, I appreciate your patience
You: It is no problem what so ever, you are being very helpful!
You: Do you think that something like white cedar would be a good wood to use?
You: I hear there is a white pine as well
AmandaJ: I will check more on that
You: My sincerest thanks to you
AmandaJ: Thanks for your paitence, there doesn't appear to be alot of information on the subject
You: There doesn't seem to be anymore these days
You: I remember back when I was young you could ask your next door neighbor about this sort of thing
You: Not much coming up? I have to leave for my costume party in a few minutes
Status: Looking for a guide ...
Status: Connected to guide: nicolec
nicolec: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
nicolec: how may i help you
You: I'm trying to find information on "search history", I want to see what my son has been looking up on the computer--i walked in on him the other day and he got all red-faced and turned the monitor off, so i want to make sure he isn't looking at anything dangerous on the lycos
nicolec: ok thats easy
nicolec: go to cookies in you desktop
nicolec: yes go to run prorams and type in cookies
nicolec: tell me what you see
nicolec: i will wait
You: thank you nicolec
You: i think i found it, maybe
nicolec: i am sending yousites too that will help
You: oh my god.
You: oh my GOD
You: HOLY SAINT ANTHONY'S FIRE!!!
You: my shithead SON has been showing people PICTURES of his DON JOHNSON to strangers on the internet!!!!!
You: he is OUT OF THE HOUSE
nicolec: oh i am sorry
You: I dont care if he's autistic
You: I just dont care anymore!!!
nicolec: Can I find anything else for you?
You: A NEW SON
nicolec: lol cant do that
nicolec: well hang in there and have a nice night
nicolec: Thanks for using ChaCha! I hope you had a great search experience!
And that's all she wrote. Thanks to everybody over at the forums, I hope you all enjoyed this Comedy Goldmine. I trust you've learned something as well — sometimes, when you're looking for a needle in a haystack, you might just end up finding gold instead.