The SA Sex Quiz: Male Edition

Question #7: Touching a beautiful woman makes me think:

"I wish she was mine."
"I am lucky to be close to somebody this magnificent."
"I hope she doesn't mind that my hands are dripping with enough sweat to fill a kiddie pool."
"I'd better get her back to the pimp in 30 minutes or he'll stab me like last time."

Question #8: I am most attracted to a woman's:

Face.
Breasts.
Legs.
Penis.

Question #9: I refer to "having sex" as:

"Making love."
"Doing it."
"Watching Mr. Sparkle enter Miss Nastyhole."
"The event which follows me slipping a roofie into her drink."

Question #10: My most embarrassing moment during sex happened when:

I needed help finding the correct hole.
I climaxed too early.
My parents walked in.
She woke up.

Question #11: The wildest thing I've ever done in bed has been:

Role-playing.
Domination / Submission.
Group sex.
Rolling over and discovering my missing complete Star Wars collection set lodged in between my rolls of ass fat.

Question #12: When I climax, I picture an image of:

The woman I'm making love to.
Explosions and fireworks.
My cat, Chester.
George Jetson.

Question #12: After sex, I like to:

Smoke a cigarette.
Cuddle.
Break things.
Scrub myself for three hours with a Brillo Pad and boiling hot water while muttering, "oh, the humanity."