Question #7: Touching a beautiful woman makes me think:
"I wish she was mine." "I am lucky to be close to somebody this magnificent." "I hope she doesn't mind that my hands are dripping with enough sweat to fill a kiddie pool." "I'd better get her back to the pimp in 30 minutes or he'll stab me like last time."
Question #8: I am most attracted to a woman's:
Face. Breasts. Legs. Penis.
Question #9: I refer to "having sex" as:
"Making love." "Doing it." "Watching Mr. Sparkle enter Miss Nastyhole." "The event which follows me slipping a roofie into her drink."
Question #10: My most embarrassing moment during sex happened when:
I needed help finding the correct hole. I climaxed too early. My parents walked in. She woke up.
Question #11: The wildest thing I've ever done in bed has been:
Role-playing. Domination / Submission. Group sex. Rolling over and discovering my missing complete Star Wars collection set lodged in between my rolls of ass fat.
Question #12: When I climax, I picture an image of:
The woman I'm making love to. Explosions and fireworks. My cat, Chester. George Jetson.
Question #12: After sex, I like to:
Smoke a cigarette. Cuddle. Break things. Scrub myself for three hours with a Brillo Pad and boiling hot water while muttering, "oh, the humanity."
It is 2016. I think it is high time that Captain America have a dog man as a boyfriend.
A brave pop culture addict puts his foot down once and for all.
Warning: some images may actually be animated .jpgs. Sorry.
fall in! *takes hit from a bong hanging around his neck*
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