Porn Star Joslyn James' Text Messages to Tiger Woods
September 7th, 2009
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 Tiger:Sent: 07:38 PM 09/07/2009:Head to the elevators and go to 334. Thats your room. The door will be open with the dead bolt. I have to get back here to wait for the food. Im in room 358. |
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 Joslyn: Sent: 07:41 PM 09/07/2009:Better delete your message before it self destructs. |
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| Tiger:Sent: 07:42 PM 09/07/2009: Let me know when you are in the room. Food just got here |
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| Joslyn: Sent: 07:45 PM 09/07/2009: Better have my 12 pack of hebrew nationals NO KETCHUP or deal is off. I'm in room btw. Looks like I could do some damage with my night terrors. |
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| Tiger:Sent: 07:47 PM 09/07/2009: Sweet. Dont come down here yet. Lots of people in the hall. I will let you know when it clears |
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| Joslyn: Sent: 07:59 PM 09/07/2009: That's cool I'm just watching monsters vs. aliens on ppv and eating 11 dollar cashews out of the fridge. |
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| Tiger:Sent: 08:16 PM 09/07/2009: Are you close to being ready |
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| Joslyn: Sent: 08:23 PM 09/07/2009: I'm ready whenever you are as long as those hebenatls are stacked n ready to be chowed on. |
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| Tiger:Sent; 08:32 PM 09/07/2009: Come on down. Its quiet here in the hall now |
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 Joslyn: Sent: 08:34 PM 09/07/2009:Okay, I'm just putting on my balaclava and backwards boots to fool the indian trackers. |
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 Tiger:Sent: 08:35 PM 09/07/2009:There is a room service cart in my hall. Be careful |
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| Joslyn: Sent: 07:41 PM 09/07/2009: oh fuck I will watch out for that thanks for the heads up btw what was your stupid room faggot I got distracted worrying about room service cart |
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| Tiger:Sent: 08:35 PM 09/07/2009: Room358 |
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| Joslyn: Sent: 09:50 PM 09/07/2009: dang boy you treated me like a naughty resusci anne in there. Loved it when u cleared my airway and asked 3 times loud if I was okay. |
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(the next afternoon)
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| Tiger:Sent: 01:28 PM 09/08/2009: Have you ever had a golden shower done to you |
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| Joslyn: Sent: 01:28 PM 09/08/2009: Did you want to rain pissy mists on me or was this just a general inquiry for the file? |
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| Tiger:Sent: 01:29 PM 09/08/2009: Just morbid curiosity |
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| Joslyn: Sent: 01:30 PM 09/08/2009: Yes I went to an exfoliating yoga retreat in europe and it was pretty much the teacher pissing on your naked body then having sex with you. |
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| Tiger:Sent: 01:30 PM 09/08/2009: Really. You. You have done just about everything havent you |
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| Joslyn: Sent: 01:31 PM 09/08/2009: I still haven't killed a child. Have you? |
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| Tiger:Sent: 01:32 PM 09/08/2009: Never done it. I think i would get stage freight |
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| Joslyn: Sent: 02:13 PM 09/08/2009: It's probably not too different from killing a teenager or an adult. Once you get past that taboo it's easy to take a life. Want to try it with me next week? |
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| Tiger:Sent: 02:28 PM 09/08/2009: Maybe |
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| Joslyn: Sent: 01:28 PM 09/08/2009: dang I just started my period, really heavy flow, and I've got the worst diarrhea of my life to go along with it joy :) |
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 Tiger:Sent: 03:38 PM 09/08/2009:I will be over in 10mins |
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 Joslyn: Sent: 03:38 PM 09/08/2009:And it'll all be over in 12mins. |
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October 4th, 2009
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 Tiger:Sent: 12:08 PM 10/04/2009:Don't Fucking talk to me. You almost just ruined my whole life. If my agent and these guys would have seen you there, Fuck |
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| Joslyn: Sent: 05:48 PM 10/04/2009: Noooo! Did the room service cart see me? |
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