Zack: I went classic monster on this one.
Steve: Solid. It's easy to forget the classics.
Zack: The thing about the manticore is that if it had a monster head it would be much less terrifying. Getting killed by a winged-lion with a dragon head or something would be bad, but when it's a giant old man head tearing into you that's a whole new level of scary.
Steve: I didn't even think about the head.
Zack: Triple-sized grandpa head with shark teeth taking off arms and legs. There's no reasoning with it either, it's like a step above animal. A screaming, giant, frenzied old man head. And you can't get away because it can fly around!
Steve: Ahhh okay I get it!Zack: And it lives in caves for some reason. So all that, plus you just walked up on its huge bone pile and shined a lantern to the back of the cave and it turns its head all pale and bloody and starts screaming AAAAHHH!
Steve: Noooo! No! Ahh!Zack: Roll initiative!
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.