Zack: I went classic monster on this one.
Steve: Solid. It's easy to forget the classics.
Zack: The thing about the manticore is that if it had a monster head it would be much less terrifying. Getting killed by a winged-lion with a dragon head or something would be bad, but when it's a giant old man head tearing into you that's a whole new level of scary.
Steve: I didn't even think about the head.
Zack: Triple-sized grandpa head with shark teeth taking off arms and legs. There's no reasoning with it either, it's like a step above animal. A screaming, giant, frenzied old man head. And you can't get away because it can fly around!
Steve: Ahhh okay I get it!Zack: And it lives in caves for some reason. So all that, plus you just walked up on its huge bone pile and shined a lantern to the back of the cave and it turns its head all pale and bloody and starts screaming AAAAHHH!
Steve: Noooo! No! Ahh!Zack: Roll initiative!
After years of being misunderstood, I had hoped we finally had "our" story. I was wrong.
He had a yellow inflatable tube around his waist, the kind with a comical duck head. There was a tiny fish in one of his hands, and a trident in the other. In the background a squirrel wearing shades was water skiing.
For fans of meaningless awards, these awards are extra meaningless.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.