Steve: I think we made fun of ropers in these articles, now you're saying you like them?
Zack: They're scary. What could be a better jump-scare than some poor adventurer walking through a dark and lonely cave, fearful of a beast of some sort and they bump into something. Whew. Only a stalactite. They turn around, searching for danger, when the stalactite opens its eyes and its big McDonaldland mouth and grabs them.
Steve: Ah! That is pretty scary. And it would be pretty scary also to be killed by a giant pickle or some sort of sausage with sausage link arms.
Zack: I feel like you're denigrating the roper.
Steve: No way. Mad respect for the roper. The scariest monsters are always stationary lumps with puppet mouths.
The singer dove off the stage and crowd surfed in a sort of reverse funeral procession where the person being carried is the only one truly alive. Touching him I felt religious ecstasy and started speaking in tongues and requesting songs that didn't exist.
There's no easy way to put this, so I'll tell it like it is. Bouillon is died. He went missing before the weekend and yesterday I found his skeletonized remains at the bottom of the #3 soup vat during one of my swims. I thought the cream of mushroom soup had an especially nourishing taste, and a lot more clumps of fur and skin than usual.
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Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.