Steve: Even the babes are grim and dark.
Zack: I get this feeling she spent hours arranging that little tableaux at the foot of the bed. "Pitcher full of venom or cursed candles? Skull in the middle? No. Brad is going to be so turned on when he sees my evil face dresser."
Steve: The mound of skulls on the headboard has to be juuuust right.
Zack: "Alright, alright, you can come in now!"
Steve: "Oh, uh, wow it looks nice. I really, uh, that's a nice color of paint on the wall. What is that?"
Zack: "Nice? You think my rotting meat wall is NICE?"
Steve: If you had a date with an evil grim babe what would you even bring her? Like the blackest most dried out flowers sticking out of a baby skeleton?
Zack: A moldy rat scrotum full of centipedes.
Steve: Bats in guts.
Zack: B*A*P*S in bapes.
Are we not allowed to be real parents anymore? We may have feared the CyborFreaks, but we damn well respected them and learned about boundaries.
A thousand years ago, dudes were dying from splinters, but now the wizard potion that cleans our light wounds costs less than a Dr. Pepper in 1994. I love this medicinal 7up.
Ron Paul spins in his chair, trying to grab his decorative antique musket but Freddy gets it first.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.