Zack: This is what happens when you leave food out for stray cats.
Steve: I don't think those are cats. Unless things were way different in olden times.
Zack: I don't know about that, but the olden times certainly had a thing with women being almost naked and attacked by animals.
Steve: Maybe it used to be a common problem.
Steve: Like how we eliminated a bunch of diseases and also we got rid of swarms of varmints attacking sexy babes.
Zack: And just like with whooping cough, Jenny McCarthy is bringing them back.
Steve: I think a lot of people would pay to see Jenny McCarthy attacked by a swarm of squirrels.
Zack: I'd settle for her getting attacked by a garbage truck.
Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.