Steve: Yessssssssssss! Girl, cast that spell like the spirit of the football team depends on it.
Zack: "Yep, just gonna cinch myself into a handkerchief, get my biggest white cape, put on my highest heels and step out on the dragon balcony to enjoy the night."
Steve: Sure, dude, go ahead and criticize how impractical wizardess costumes are, but they rely on magic to avoid damage so they can have as much of their boobs hanging out as they want.
Zack: She looks like a stripper from Ft. Lauderdale trying to surrender to someone by way of a Google Map.
Steve: I don't even understand that joke, but if the strippers look like this, I am going to Ft. Lauderdale.
Zack: I wouldn't. When you get up close you realize she surrendered to the crystal a long time ago.
Steve: Wizards do love their crystals.
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
It's just a little confusing, is all.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.