Let not the Bridges be Forsaken with Tom "Moof" Davies

Livestock: what about a monster that eats bridges
Moof: that is no monster :)
Livestock: i will draw your ire
Livestock: it looks like a barn with a plane flying through it
Moof: oh no
Livestock: what do you mean a monster that eats bridges is no monster
Livestock: bridges are important
Moof: nope
Moof: they are not important
Moof: they are like roads in the air
Moof: how is that natural
Moof: it is bad
Livestock: how would you get to islands and over rivers
Moof: BARGES
Livestock: people can't rely on barges
Livestock: that is ridiculous
Moof: yes they can
Livestock: bridges are the way to go and a monster that eats bridges is a terrible thing indeed
Moof: no i disagree strongly
Livestock: well you've never been more wrong in your whole life
Moof: i am reading the wikipedia article on Pre-Columbian trans-oceanic contact
Moof: they didnt have bridges then
Moof: and they did just fine
Livestock: well that's absurd because in our modern world we need things fast and ready at all times and a bridge does the trick nicely. you might say, moof, that bridges bridge the gap.
Moof: you might say that but if you did you are wrong totally wrong
Livestock: do you even know what a bridge is
Livestock: have you not had to travel
Livestock: what do you do drive your car off the road into rivers??
Livestock: i bet you do
Livestock: you would be just the kind of fool to do such a thing
Moof: once i almost got to the other shore
Moof: almost
Moof: and i will figure it out
Moof: and then you will be the one who is crying silently to himself alone in his dark apartment
Livestock: what about a monster that eats barges
Livestock: i tell you what that monster is doing a public service eating barges
Moof: NO
Livestock: YES
Moof: why would you like a monster that would eat your family
Livestock: i am not a barge you drunken fool!!

– Josh "Livestock" Boruff (@Livestock)

More Mooflogs

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.