Livestock: what about a monster that eats bridges
Moof: that is no monster :)
Livestock: i will draw your ire
Livestock: it looks like a barn with a plane flying through it
Moof: oh no
Livestock: what do you mean a monster that eats bridges is no monster
Livestock: bridges are important
Moof: they are not important
Moof: they are like roads in the air
Moof: how is that natural
Moof: it is bad
Livestock: how would you get to islands and over rivers
Livestock: people can't rely on barges
Livestock: that is ridiculous
Moof: yes they can
Livestock: bridges are the way to go and a monster that eats bridges is a terrible thing indeed
Moof: no i disagree strongly
Livestock: well you've never been more wrong in your whole life
Moof: i am reading the wikipedia article on Pre-Columbian trans-oceanic contact
Moof: they didnt have bridges then
Moof: and they did just fine
Livestock: well that's absurd because in our modern world we need things fast and ready at all times and a bridge does the trick nicely. you might say, moof, that bridges bridge the gap.
Moof: you might say that but if you did you are wrong totally wrong
Livestock: do you even know what a bridge is
Livestock: have you not had to travel
Livestock: what do you do drive your car off the road into rivers??
Livestock: i bet you do
Livestock: you would be just the kind of fool to do such a thing
Moof: once i almost got to the other shore
Moof: and i will figure it out
Moof: and then you will be the one who is crying silently to himself alone in his dark apartment
Livestock: what about a monster that eats barges
Livestock: i tell you what that monster is doing a public service eating barges
Moof: why would you like a monster that would eat your family
Livestock: i am not a barge you drunken fool!!
2 PM: Steven J. accidentally drops his vintage Trapper Keeper, revealing erotic drawings of the ‘bunny girls’ emoji. The room draws silent. Slowly, member after member opens his/her notebooks and tablets, revealing dozens of pages of bunny girl emoji fanart. The room votes 12-0 never to speak of this again.
He was ripped off for True Detective, now Thomas Ligotti is being asked to review Pizza Hut's new Hotdog Pizza Bites.
Moof and Livestock discuss life, love, human nature, and all the most important issues affecting humanity.