Livestock: what about a monster that eats bridges
Moof: that is no monster :)
Livestock: i will draw your ire
Livestock: it looks like a barn with a plane flying through it
Moof: oh no
Livestock: what do you mean a monster that eats bridges is no monster
Livestock: bridges are important
Moof: they are not important
Moof: they are like roads in the air
Moof: how is that natural
Moof: it is bad
Livestock: how would you get to islands and over rivers
Livestock: people can't rely on barges
Livestock: that is ridiculous
Moof: yes they can
Livestock: bridges are the way to go and a monster that eats bridges is a terrible thing indeed
Moof: no i disagree strongly
Livestock: well you've never been more wrong in your whole life
Moof: i am reading the wikipedia article on Pre-Columbian trans-oceanic contact
Moof: they didnt have bridges then
Moof: and they did just fine
Livestock: well that's absurd because in our modern world we need things fast and ready at all times and a bridge does the trick nicely. you might say, moof, that bridges bridge the gap.
Moof: you might say that but if you did you are wrong totally wrong
Livestock: do you even know what a bridge is
Livestock: have you not had to travel
Livestock: what do you do drive your car off the road into rivers??
Livestock: i bet you do
Livestock: you would be just the kind of fool to do such a thing
Moof: once i almost got to the other shore
Moof: and i will figure it out
Moof: and then you will be the one who is crying silently to himself alone in his dark apartment
Livestock: what about a monster that eats barges
Livestock: i tell you what that monster is doing a public service eating barges
Moof: why would you like a monster that would eat your family
Livestock: i am not a barge you drunken fool!!
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Moof and Livestock discuss life, love, human nature, and all the most important issues affecting humanity.