As overseer of this game, it is my theme to give the player "a special feeling." I have experienced much of "a special feeling" in the designing of this game, so I say why should you not as well? Over the following months, I will drip slowly to you informations about my game. Please anticipate it greatly.
If you are not aware of the meaning of a Smash Brother, please, follow me!
He is the one they call "the fetching rogue." But what is the mystery behind the chap who took only minutes to die in A Legend of Zelda: The Link to the Past? Fans of Nintendo have been clamoring for these answers, and we wish to submit the following theses as evidence! Prepare to receive the swords from us!
You shall find that Link's Uncle fits in well with our gallery of fighting. Gaze at the mustache? Is he perhaps a kin of Mario?
Ho no Link! That is an uncle of you! But it is important to remember that all blood ties are put aside in the world of Smash Brothers. I ask you to respect that.
Why the bemusement, Donkey Kong? Is the mind of an ape not fit to comprehend the laws of man? What our jungle friend doesn't realize is that Link's Uncle is a dispenser of swords. Capture it from him!
When the swords to dispense are no longer remaining, Link's Uncle waits quietly on the sidelines as the other players "duke it out." He is a character full of the politeness, perhaps for your grandma? Link's Uncle says, "I am not one for conflict!"
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
It's just a little confusing, is all.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.