Every day is a rainy day because God is crying.
I think if you got really, really enormously fat - like 850 pounds - and you tried to stand up really fast, that maybe you could make your skeleton burst out of the top of your body.
Wow, what an unexpected surprise. Just like when someone dumps their baby's foul-ass diaper in the open window of your car on a 95 degree day.
Remember in the movie Dave where Kevin Kline was hooked up to those giant robotic arms and he stuck them out and said "I once caught a fish thiiiiis biiiiig"? Do they still have those?
Holy Good God Moses
The human anatomy is home to more than three hundred organs. Doctors and chocolatiers agree that the vast majority of these revolting lumps of tissue serve little to no function. If you find yourself standing in a long line or stuck at the airport waiting for a delayed flight, consider taking a few minutes to remove the following from your person.
Do you have what it takes to make it on the ballot?
Denzel is here to set the movie scales back to zero. That's what an equalizer does, right?
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