I'm just going to pretend "uniguy82" has been getting a running start and sliding around on grass and dirt. It's better this way.

Yup, totally straight!WINK WINK

Has anyone come up with a good reason to not mess with Texas yet? Because I sure haven't.

"Moses! What are thou eating under there?" Underoos 2:11

I really expected more camaraderie among dudes who have nothing in common but their love for sniffing underwears.

More The Weekend Web

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.

  • Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'

Copyright ©2015 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.