Rooting Out Evil, submitted by Stu. The only Internet trend more pathetic than furries and cripple porn is probably online petitions. While they may not be as offensive they are every bit as dopey. Take for example "Rooting Out Evil", a site devoted to recruiting people to join a "movement" (my kitten's bowels have had bigger movements) that will head from the far-flung reaches of Canada into the United States to inspect our country for Weapons of Mass Destruction. I don't want to be down on Canada or anything, because there are probably people in parts of California who had this same idea, but this is pretty damn sad. They are seriously requesting money for bus fair to go to the United States and search for nuclear bombs. Here's a hint activist MENSA-members; ask the US government for a brochure. They probably give guided tours of missile silos.
Rooting Out Evil is a campaign of resistance to US unilateralism and domination of global affairs. The campaign is aimed at reframing the perception of the US’s role in world politics by turning President Bush’s rhetoric and tactics against him.
We oppose the development, storage, and use of weapons of mass destruction (chemical, biological, or nuclear) by any state.
We are based in Canada, but have allies and supporters in the US and around the world.
Look, we know our government sucks, we don't need you filthy Canadians coming to America and telling us how evil we are. It's like writing a ten-page letter to the Captain of the Titanic that he just hit an iceberg and then dropping it on the ocean at his last known location. Yes, we know, we're all triple Hitlers, thanks for the info, yes, we've got nukes, yes, thanks again. Please stand over there and visualize a giant boot stepping on us for all of time.
If you would like to join this movement, please note that the front page of the site is a signup form! I'm sure they can use your support because lord knows Internet petitions have so far done so well in changing the world!
(Lips smacking, mouth full of peanut butter, glistening streams of peanut butter oil running down chin) "I'm full as hell, and I'm not going to take another bite!"
I saw good men turned to mush in the wars against the soggies. Men much better than you, Mr. President. If you are going to take John Brennan's security clearance, take my security clearance too.
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