Submitted by Andrew P.
Pfft. What a bunch of posers. If any TRUE metal fan wanted to start a fire, they'd sacrifice a virgin to the Dark Lord Azathoth and then cast Firaga on the faggot (as in the pile of wood, not the dude wearing the speedo).
Welp, that about wraps it up for another hilarious AwfulVision! Thanks a lot to all the people who submitted videos and extra special thanks to the Indonesian sweat shop workers who ghost write my article each week! You are the best help that 25 cents per person per week can buy!
If you'd like to join in on the wacky hyjinx and tomfoolery, submit a video by clicking this link right here!
See you jerks next time!
Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.
The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'
This ain't your daddy's globe...! .... or is it?!
As you may have noticed, the most popular viral videos at any given time are amazingly banal, annoying, and cliched pieces of waste. It almost seems as if the internet naturally gravitates towards the worst possible Youtube and Google video selections. So it stands to reason that if the terrible videos become popular, then the unpopular videos must be awesome! We here at Something Awful present to you AwfulVision™, our own patented service dedicated to showcasing a wide selection of unpopular videos that apparently must be good! Welcome to Web 3.9. Welcome to AwfulVision™!