Steve: Tornado man hates cones.
Zack: Are we on the same page on this font shit yet?Steve: I don't know dude, I was more interested in the fact that tornado man has tornado thumbs. Like, he can open tornado doors.
Zack: So this giant, evil Michelin Man is the equivalent of a storm god throwing the Xbox controller at the TV.
Steve: Yeah, if the Xbox controller was like hundreds of feet tall and destroying cities.Zack: I'm afraid it's much worse than that, Steve. Xbox controllers are destroying an entire generation of our tweens with a sedentary lifestyle.
Steve: But Xbox totally makes up for that by preparing them for a lifetime of low level tech supporting by yelling horrible things at strangers over their headsets.
Zack: If you're wondering how you fight something like this thing, well, here's how Craig thinks it would go down:
Zack: Wow, what a blast. Prior to combat buff this monster like crazy then roll to attack everyone all at once and cast multiple spells per round. Then summon another giant, super-powerful monster that also does eight things a turn.
Steve: Yeah, but the imagery of devastation is wicked.Zack: It's a cartoon tornado fist-fighting trees.
One wizard thinks our President's magic control initiatives have gone too far.
Are we not allowed to be real parents anymore? We may have feared the CyborFreaks, but we damn well respected them and learned about boundaries.
Ron Paul spins in his chair, trying to grab his decorative antique musket but Freddy gets it first.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.