Steve: Maybe it's the bat wing ears or the fangs on the trunk, but this one has a cool sort of Halloween vibe to it.Zack: Nothing says horrifying abomination quite like chicken arms.
Steve: My favorite thing about this dude is that it says he can swallow anything. Even things bigger than him.
Steve: And that's where things get interesting.
Zack: This has to be a first. A random encounter chart for inside a monster.
Steve: Oh, come on, this one is cool. A giant galactic elephant that swallows you to an alternate dimension that rains acid?Zack: Big deal. I can get a rain of acid from swallowing a Chicago style hotdog.
Steve: But do you have an angel on a rescue mission inside your body?
Zack: Yes, the archangel Zantac is rescuing me from reflux.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.