Zack: I think I saw this on a jazz album cover.

Steve: At a certain point I feel like Craig should go ahead and create stats for the Dungeon Master.

Zack: An overweight man in a Homestuck sweatshirt peers at you over the screen from Vampire that he uses to hide his dice rolls. A cold chill burns up your balls as you see him lift his balding head from behind the screen. He lets out a primordial cry of rage and begins to roll initiative for a creature that is like way too powerful for you guys.

Steve: Luckily, Craig provided adventure ideas for how to use this thing in your game.
Zack: Do you still believe that Craig is a force for good?

Steve: I stand by the fact that he has some good ideas. And he is a man after my own heart.

Zack: But....?

Steve: But maybe tone it down a little bit with the giant numbers. People will think you have an illness.


Zack is the author of the new short story collection Wages: Future Tales of a Hired Gun, a blood-soaked satire of private military contracting. He is also the author of the genre-hopping novel Liminal States, soon to be available as an audiobook. You can find out more about Zack's latest projects and special offers on his Facebook page.

– Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons (@sexyfacts4u)

More WTF, D&D!?

This Week on Something Awful...

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.