Zack: Love that they included weird meta-gaming cards in the original series.
Steve: All cards like this were banned from tournaments almost right away.
Zack: So you just use it when you're playing with your friends to make them angry and never want to play with you again? Actually, that's a good idea, because you're going to be playing Magic in a hobby shop next to a bunch of kids playing Yu-Gi-Oh! and Pokemon while their mom sits in the corner on a folding chair and reads The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo. And no, she won't have sex with you, because she's married, has a nice house, and she just watched you get in a red-faced yelling match over when you can play a sorcery card. Also you're spilling out of an anime t-shirt and you smell like a gas station egg salad sandwich.
Steve: Way to stereotype your own people, hater.
"Really, Holmes!" I dropped into my seat, shocked. "You are remarkably tall! What are you, six foot six? Six foot eight?"
As the 19th century diver approaches a giant clam, a flash of brilliant golden light flares from within the shell. I emerge in a swirl of bubbles and do the timeless universal underwater hand signals for the following: ZODIAC KILLER, KKK, BLOOD OF YOUTH
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.