Zack: All of the text on the card is literally about trees fucking.
Steve: Do Not Summon Treefolk.
Zack: Treefolk outside groaning all night dropping pine cones on my car. If they do it again tonight I'm setting fire to front yard.
Steve: I tried turning the hose on them but they just did it more!!
Zack: I hear if you lay some stumps out in your yard it will scare them off.
Steve: Yeah, that's great until you get one of those real sicko trees. Then you wake up and the stumps are covered in sap.
Zack: Nature is horrible. That's the lesson here. Do not meddle with nature.
And you thought women had one-dimensional script intros that treated them like sex objects. Ewoks have it even worse.
No one seems to like the new Doom box art. But it's still the same old Doom Guy under that space marine helmet. Right?
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.