Zack: "Uh, yeah, I'll take two family-sized buckets of blue fish-lady. Hold the trident, extra haughty."

Steve: "I only want a half order of purple pants."

Zack: "The menu says it comes with a ridiculously huge crown. Could I supersize that?"

Steve: When she got dressed in her mer-broad room this morning she actually looked in the mirror and said, "Today I feel like purple one-piece, knife straps, and my giant bucket boots."

Zack: Hey, guys, she's single and she has a submarine.

Steve: It says her submarine can duplicate credit cards. That seems awfully suspicious.

Zack: You might even say "fishy."

Steve: Her identity is unknown to the general public. Like pretty much all identities.

Zack: No identity is safe from her counterfeiting submarine. Dive to 300 meters! Start pumping out Mastercards for the LifeLock guy!

Steve: "This had better work at the Navaho casino."

Zack: They hand you really respectful foam tomahawk buckets to catch your coins as they fall out of the Chief Pays-Out-To-Coyotes' Heap Wampum slots.

Steve: Or if you want you can just use your giant bucket boots.

Zack: White man win jackpot so big he put house on trail of tears.

More WTF, D&D!?

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.