Zack: Folks just don't go out on the town in the blue fringe boots anymore.
Steve: Yellow tights and giant Pilgrim belts may be coming back though.
Zack: Screaming until people have nightmarish hallucinations never goes out of style.
Steve: The name's Angar. David Allan Angar. Of the New York Angars.
Zack: "Alright, open the vault and everybody on the ground and nobody has to see the blood-puking fish men turn into your mom again!"
Steve: "These solid gold bracers aren't going to finance themselves!"
Zack: He's really bad with women. He lures them in with his hairy hippy drifter good looks, but once he gets them in bed things go all wrong. "Awww yeah, Angar is going to bust a hippy mess in ya. AAAAHHHH!"
Steve: Ladies do not love Screaming Angar.
Zack: Not once they see the tornado they can never warn everyone about in time.
Steve: "He was sexy in that Billy Jack rapist villain sort of way, but halfway through having sex he started screaming and I had to take a math test I didn't study for and it counted for all of my grade."
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About This Column
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.
Previous Articles
- The Fantastic Artwork of Frank Frazetta
- The 10 Reasons We Will Never Review F.A.T.A.L.
- More Lost Treasures of the AD&D 2nd Edition Monstrous Compendium
- Lost Treasures of the AD&D 2nd Edition Monstrous Compendium
- The World of Synnibarr (1993)
