~PICK OF THE YEAR~
Random Oni Table Rolls
89: Bird;barrel chested, narrow lower abdomen, short thick neck
59: Fish-like head
43: Large wide flat nose, ape like.
75: Normal human eyes
33: Normal mouth, but twice as large, pointed/crooked teeths
86: Bird like clawed hand, powerful arms
47: Upper legs powerfully built, lower legs thin, 2 large clawed toes
08: Covered in tiny scales
58: Jade green
Description: n/aThe Verdict
Zack: Submissions from the criminally insane presents:what daddy looks like when I close my eyes.
Steve: It's like if Yellow Submarine was remade with transparent chicken parts.Zack: Rolled a 30, guess that means he has dinosaur hocks ending in carrot nibs.
Steve: Oops, 88, Crazy Old Lady Lipsticked Turtle Mouth.
Zack: What's that Turdbody Turtle Lady? Kill my family? Well, if you say so!
Transgressive author Chuck Palahniuk is here to help with tips and tricks to hacking your life.
Not what I had in mind when I ordered an Italian gondolier. This is literally just a tiny toy. Needless to say, the Italian businessmen were not impressed and I looked like a damn fool. We lost the pizza pie account and will have to lay off half our factory.
Time to applaud the man who applauds in a loop until the end of time.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.