~PICK OF THE YEAR~
Random Oni Table Rolls
89: Bird;barrel chested, narrow lower abdomen, short thick neck
59: Fish-like head
43: Large wide flat nose, ape like.
75: Normal human eyes
33: Normal mouth, but twice as large, pointed/crooked teeths
86: Bird like clawed hand, powerful arms
47: Upper legs powerfully built, lower legs thin, 2 large clawed toes
08: Covered in tiny scales
58: Jade green
Description: n/aThe Verdict
Zack: Submissions from the criminally insane presents:what daddy looks like when I close my eyes.
Steve: It's like if Yellow Submarine was remade with transparent chicken parts.Zack: Rolled a 30, guess that means he has dinosaur hocks ending in carrot nibs.
Steve: Oops, 88, Crazy Old Lady Lipsticked Turtle Mouth.
Zack: What's that Turdbody Turtle Lady? Kill my family? Well, if you say so!
Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.
The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'
This ain't your daddy's globe...! .... or is it?!
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.