Don't let hack "gaming journalists" and nefarious redditors try to trick you into playing Gone Home by pretending it's some sort of lame simulator for squares-only activities such as reading a novel and having feelings. Maybe THEY get their jollies luring casual gamers and curious bookworms into a terrifying interactive experience that will haunt their dreams forever, but I consider it my personal duty to expose the truth: Gone Home is actually this year's most exciting horror/exploration shooter!
Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
You have summoned him and now he is here!