You hear that sound? That crashing sound? That's cars wrecking from men seeing Halle Berry's cleavage. Men are dying and wrecking into things. Their families are screaming, "look out! Jesus! Tom, stop!" and those men don't care. They drive to their deaths. They're stumbling out of broken cars, ignoring their injured children, stepping over their dead aunt, fixated on those precious pepper jacks. One look is all it took to hook them on these grandiose grabbers. Get two hearty handfuls and go to your grave. How many teeth will you swallow? How many gallons of blood? I am shitting and pissing myself and I don't care. I forgot about everything else. This is what we men do. Nothing wrong with it.
Someone told TIME magazine about trolling and now we all just have to deal with it.
If that boy isn't willing to shoot his laser and get you that carbon, he's not worth your time.
Available in Large, which is actually a Medium stretched out to appear bigger.
Featured articles and columns that don't fit anywhere else on Something Awful.