You hear that sound? That crashing sound? That's cars wrecking from men seeing Halle Berry's cleavage. Men are dying and wrecking into things. Their families are screaming, "look out! Jesus! Tom, stop!" and those men don't care. They drive to their deaths. They're stumbling out of broken cars, ignoring their injured children, stepping over their dead aunt, fixated on those precious pepper jacks. One look is all it took to hook them on these grandiose grabbers. Get two hearty handfuls and go to your grave. How many teeth will you swallow? How many gallons of blood? I am shitting and pissing myself and I don't care. I forgot about everything else. This is what we men do. Nothing wrong with it.
Republicans announce that all legislation must be voted on at 2am in a secret chamber, with no one but the lobbyists who write the bills seeing a single line of text. Democrats' Response: Stumbling around a field stepping on rakes, handles smashing them directly in their faces every single time.
There is a witch hunt going on right now and I promise you that you will not find any witches in the pleasure room in my congressional office.
For fans of meaningless awards, these awards are extra meaningless.
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