Megan Fox is aptly named (she is a fox). This beauty is transforming wieners all over America from soft lil' baby wieners to full tumescent poon pounders ready to tear through shorts and shred snizz. Really wreck up some girl guts with those things, because we have seen parts of her breasts and now we are compelled to do that thing to her insides. Look at those things. Every man in the office wants to kill animals and lay them down at her feet. Not just regular animals either, beautiful animals, like peacocks and swans and little smiling babies, frozen in their moment of joy, or at least their head and neck and other parts that will please her. After all, trophy is good, we did get lil' bit hungry carrying them things around in our mouths.
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
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