big duck equals goose
> Take off your shirt, get up on stage and push in front of the mic, scream "I love you wife!!" And stage dive onto her.
> Get up on stage and re-propose to her and then get remarried by GWAR in a brutal, bloody ceremony
> Shout at GWAR to play Free Bird
> Inform wife that made you incredibly aroused. Take her to seedy rent by the hour motel. Buy her some crack.
> Stroke her arm softly then tell her you'll take her home in a soothing manner. Leave her at the concert then go home and fuck the babysitter.
> devour horse figurines
18 Character Limit
> violently excrete ponies at Byron to finally teach him fundamental manliness.
> Masturbate on everything you can (including your son and the sitter).
Grand Prize Winner
we can still make this right
> bar son's door, set fire to everything
Elliot said my breakup must have been due to the sweater curse, an unexplained phenomenon where anyone who gives their significant other a hand-knit sweater gets dumped. The only way to break the curse, Elliot said, was to destroy the sweater.
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