Yeah, craigslist! You know that creepy website where nobody wants anything but anonymous sex and garage sale announcements? That's this one!
Give this fellow a hand!
This is just a great idea for everyone involved.
Oh baby, your rippling arms turn me on!
Good gracious, ass is bodacious.
The right man will come along someday if you just keep your chin up!
"Anyone need head?! I got a real gross one!"
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
Expendable? You must be joking.
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