IdeoPraxist cried at the end of "Doom 3."

TunaSled is still more scary than Clive Barker and Wes Craven combined into a single robotic body with bleeding swords for nipples.

TheSniperZERO is heir to a massive yogurt fortune.

QED is thinking about redecorating his cave after he defeats the bear.

Secks knows terror like no one else, except for maybe the victims of terrorism.

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  • GLUT OF DOGS

    GLUT OF DOGS

    TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851

  • THE PERFECT HUMAN FORM

    THE PERFECT HUMAN FORM

    Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.

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