It will be great on the day after Election Day that we can all get back to tweeting about our kids and exaggerated working conditions.— Shawn Garrett (@ShawnGarrett) October 18, 2012
My sister is my parents favorite cause she’s pregnant with twins and I’m the least favorite cause I spend my money on chicken stars.— Tracy Marquez (@tracy_marq) October 22, 2012
"Soft Launch" is an industry term for "excuse to get drunk and DJ tonight."— Brock Wilbur (@brockwilbur) October 19, 2012
How many times a day do you have to urinate to officially earn the title "Human Pee Machine Who Pees Like It's His/Her Freaking CAREER"? 14?— Joe Randazzo (@Randazzoj) October 11, 2012
Neither candidate addressed the fact that we have a Hulk— Andy Levy (@andylevy) October 23, 2012
Forget Target or Best Buy, if you want deals this Black Friday you can't do better than smoking massive, mind-melting quantities of DMT.
A reluctant family is forced to welcome a non-human participant to Thanksgiving dinner.
You cant go around life being smart in an unconventional way, it could change the world.
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