Do people really respond to these personal ads? I mean actual people, not just fat slobs and spam bots.

She made my job easier by insulting herself for me.

Something tells me that hiring a hooker is the only way this guy is going to get laid.

When student exchange programs go sour.

I ate my cum on my trip into outer space.

I can safely say these women are over 200 pounds.

So that's why the cat is always missing between 4:45 and 5:00.

I'd rather be playing Knights of the Old Republic than writing stupid captions but Lowtax won't let me out of the basement until I'm done.

More The Weekend Web

This Week on Something Awful...

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.