This is some Cliff Claven shit.
And now for a few more brilliant thoughts on race relations.
It's a whole lot easier to get a better haircut than it is to learn a new language.
I see this kind of shit all the time and it makes me wonder: By essentially saying "I hate all religious people and I want to destroy them because they're so pushy" doesn't that make you exactly the same kind of asshole you're angry about?
I haven't seen my aunt in YEARS.
The treacherous New England Patriots are guilty of deflating their footballs. We must punish them severely in the name of holy retribution. This transgression has been the biggest headline in the United States for an entire week, and it should be the primary concern of all nations.
We have used extensive market research to determine the average consumers of America's favorite rolls of caramel-oozing choco cysts.
There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.