I get some funny customer incidents at work. I am the manager of a restaurant. One day these two people came in and the girl walked right up to me (I was standing behind the cashier) and asked if we take discover (there is a sign right in front of her face that says we only take Visa/Mastercard/American express.)
Her: Do you take Discover?
Her(apparantly shocked and appalled by the fact I said no): WHAT?
Me (slow and enunciated): NOOOOOOOOO.
She got pissed and stormed out.
"What can I put with an oscar that kills everything I put with it?"
I used to do tech support. One day at about 10 AM this dude with a thick country accent calls in, slurring his words pretty badly.
Me: Thank you for calling blah blah...
Dude: Yeah, you got a guy named uh, Justin workin' there?
Me: Yes, sir, would you like me to transfer you?
Dude: Well, this is (whatever his name was). You just tell him for me, that he's a stupid
sonofabitch and if I had a boot in one hand..
At that point I just hung up. I didn't really want to know what was in the other hand at the time. Now I wish I'd have let him finish.
This happened back in Fall 2001 at Funcoland (Now Gamestop).
Customer: So I hear that PS3 is coming out next spring.
Me: I don't think so, PS2 just came out last year.
Customer: But I heard it downtown from a guy in a suit!
Me: So if someone wears a suit, it must be true?
Customer: ...Nevermind. (leaves store)
I work at a video rental place
Me: "Ok Ma'am, those are due back on Saturday before midnight"
Her: "I.. have to return these?"
Something I witnessed weeks ago:
Customer: Hi, I'd like a few cups please.
Clerk: Our cups are 16 cents each.
Customer: But I just bought an orange juice here.
Clerk: Sorry, they're still 16 cents.
Customer: I'm not paying 16 cents for cups.
Customer: So, can I have some cups?
Clerk: Cups are 16 cents each.
Customer: FUCK YOU AND THIS SHIT!
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The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.