Gary Gygax's Cyborg Commando (1987)
Zack: Or carry one flashlight.
Steve: An x-ray flashlight?
Zack: Okay, maybe that one is sort of cool, but it's not worth getting rid of your balls over. Not even if you get the most phallic laser rifle I've ever seen.
Steve: Techno sunglasses dude. You can like watch the big game and look through a babe's shirt and calculate where to shoot a laser blast to collapse a bridge onto a bug legion.
Zack: Sure and after 20 years, after the bugs win and enslave all of mankind, the surviving cyborg commandos find out the techno glasses caused brain tumors.
Steve: Their chest is an x-ray machine.
